I am a good person. I am not a slob. Sure, sometimes I throw my clothes on my chair or bed, instead of putting them away immediately. Sometimes, I’ll put off doing the dishes for a couple days. And maybe, maybe I’ve occasionally waited too long between bathroom cleanings. But, I repeat, I am NOT a slob.
Which is why what happened last night shocked the crap out of me.
I was sitting on my bed, ready to write you all something clever and witty. And out of the corner of my eye, I saw something dart out from underneath my bed. Oh. My. God. Just as quickly, it darted back under, but I didn’t need more than glance.
I had my very first cockroach.
I’ve lived in dorms/apartments for the past 5 1/2 years – and spent a good chunk of that in Baltimore, no less. Not the cleanest city, but I’ve NEVER had any critters whatsoever. Even when the apartment down the hall had mice, my apartment was fine. Ant infestation across the way? Nope, not chez moi. So why is this happening now?
I spent the rest of the night alternately sitting in the middle of my bed, unwilling to touch the floor, and stalking the little critter, ready to stomp him or suck him up into the vacuum.
(I Googled to find a picture of the little guy and got completely grossed out. Again. It’s not his fault he’s ugly, but he is NOT welcome here.)
I nearly had him once, as he ventured out while my back was turned. I moved slowly, stealthily, and just as I raised my booted foot to stomp, he darted back to the safety of the water heater closet. That little sucker.
I called the front desk of my building, and they’re sending up an exterminator. I hope I can delude myself into thinking that it’ll be gone in one shot.
*fingers crossed* Please let it work. Please let it work.
(P.S. As I was writing this, I was afraid to turn off all my lights because I know they like dark places. Also, I was afraid to sleep because I’m afraid of it crawling on me. I think I’ve seen The Craft too many times.)