Archive for August, 2014

I am 29 years old.

I am too old for hickeys.

But apparently, my hungry, teething, 4-month-old did not get that memo.


Thanks a lot, kid.

Note to self: feed him immediately next time.

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Me: When you see a road labeled “business” what does that mean to you?

Husband: It’s like having a local or express lane.

Me: Right, but which one would it be?

Husband: Local. Why?

Me: Oh…well, in my head, the business lane was always the express lane. Because I always imagined that if you’re on business, you want to get there faster.

Husband: No…[many jokes involving the phrase, “Out of my way! I mean business!”] but I love the way your brain works.


And I can’t even blame this one on pregnancy brain.

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It seems like one day you’re begging your unborn child to just get out already, and the next you have a 4-month-old who coos and giggles and has newly discovered happy baby pose.

I've yet to capture happy baby pose with the camera. He's too fast!

I’ve yet to capture happy baby pose with the camera. He’s too fast!


How does time do that?

After N was born, and I had managed to scrape together more than 20 minutes of sleep at a time, I had all of these blog ideas running through my head:

  • Things I wish I’d known about labor (including how to cope when the epidural wears off before you start pushing)
  • Why “sleep when the baby sleeps” is impossible
  • What to do when strangers reach for your child
  • Pretty much anything about strangers reacting to and asking personal questions about your baby and childbirth

And yet, you’ll notice that there has been complete radio silence since I last posted. Not even a, “Hey! He’s here!” post. Nothing. Because you know what?

This kid is a time-suck.

To be fair, I mean that in the best possible way. Of all the things that I could be spending time on, I love that it’s him. But these past four months have been a complete shift in priorities and time management. They’ve also been an incredible learning experience.

I’ve learned that:

…a 15  minute shower is a luxury.

…baby smiles make everything better.

…when your baby is teething, anything that comes near his mouth is fair game.

…you’ll need at least twice as long as you think you will to get out of the house.

…it’s perfectly normal to go from laughing to crying to laughing in the span of two minutes – both for you and the baby.

…you will get peed on.

…you will get poop on you.

…OxiClean is amazing.

…baby yawns are almost as cute as baby smiles.

…joint baby and puppy naps will melt your heart.

…I wouldn’t change a thing.


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