Posts Tagged ‘say what?’

You know how when you call the credit card company or your insurance agency, the automated system usually tells you, this call may be monitored or recorded for quality purposes?

I always assumed those purposes were quality service.

Yesterday I called my insurance company to find out their policy on covering vaccinations (for Nepal). I knew it was highly unlikely, but wanted to cover all my bases. So I asked.

Insurance rep: “No, we don’t usually cover vaccines. Which ones are you looking for?

Me: “Well, one is rabies…

Insurance rep: “Oh, you were bitten?

Me: “No, it’s preventative.

IR: “They don’t do preventative.

Me: “Oh, well, I actually just talked to my doctor, and he said that they do.

IR: “No. They don’t do preventative rabies shots around here.

Me: “It’s for international travel.

IR: “Ha!* Well now this call is recorded as you saying it’s for travel and we definitely don’t cover shots for international travel.

*It might have been more “ah!” than “ha!” but there was no mistaking the excitement in her voice. 

At this point, I knew it was a done deal, but I was curious about one more thing.

Me: “Oh, okay. So…you don’t even cover polio boosters? I thought I read something about getting a booster every 10 years.

IR: “Ma’am, I’ve already recorded you saying it’s for international travel, so, no.

Me: “Listen, I’m not trying to be sneaky. I was just looking for information. But thanks for your help.

And I hung up.

Perhaps that wasn’t the mature way to handle it.

But at that point I was done being recorded.

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The other night I went to the salon to test out a hairstyle for my wedding day. The stylist worked her magic and I knew, immediately, that this was what I wanted. I had curls cascading down my back and I couldn’t stop grinning as I walked home – even in the rain.

I waited eagerly for BNF to get home so he could see it, and I may have kept bouncing the curls around, as they’re so very different from (and much more fun than) my usually pin-straight hair.

Finally I heard the key in the lock, I saw BNF evaluate my hair, and saw the smile on his face.

I like it, baby,” he told me. “It looks great! It looks like a beautiful horse’s mane!

I was too surprised to come up with anything better than, “Did you just call me a horse?

I thought about it more, and came up with a better conclusion: BNF was simply channeling is inner Sir Ulrich von Leichtenstein.

In A Knight’s Tale, if you’re unfamiliar with the classic, Sir Ulrich attempts to hit on Jocelyn with the line, “Your beauty will be reflected in the power of my arm and my horse’s flanks.

Needless to say, it does not go over so well, and Jocelyn only barely listens when her friend and maid tells her, “Maybe where he comes from it means love.

Sure. Let’s go with that.

Horse comparison=love.

In these two cases, anyway. And these two only, I hope.

Though, now I wonder if it would be appropriate to trot down the aisle.

Decisions decisions.

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Back in September, BNF joined a baseball league and last night I finally got the chance to go to one of his games. One of the first things he told me about when he started was the coach. “He’s really anti-marriage,” he told me. “He actually sent me an article about how marriage is bad for you after I told him I was engaged.

So, naturally, I couldn’t wait to meet this guy, and I was certain that I’d be welcome at the game.

Coach did not disappoint.

I introduced myself when we got to the field, before the guys started warming up.

So you’re going to try that marriage thing?” he asked me. “It’s a mistake. You’ll be so bored. Can you really imagine spending the rest of your life with the same person? God, that’s awful.

When I told him that not only was I excited about my upcoming marriage, but that I was inspired by my parents (who will be celebrating 35 years in November!), it prompted him to ask me how old I was.

You’re only 26? And you can really imagine spending the next 20 to 30 years with the same person?

I’m not really sure how we got from “the rest of your life” to “20 to 30 years,” unless he thinks that everyone dies before 60. What an optimist.

After Coach left the bleachers to go warm up with the team, another guy who had been sitting there the entire time, unassociated with the team, turned to me.

That guy is a piece of work! He’s really something else.

I assured him that I’d been warned and we laughed and chatted a bit. And when he stood up to leave he joked, “Well, I guess I’ll just go back to my “boring” wife of 21 years. I’ll tell her, ‘you know, honey, I thought things were great until I heard this unsolicited advice from a guy at the field – guess we’ll have to change things up.‘”

The real kicker, though, aside from the reaction of complete strangers, came at the end of the game, when Coach started a sentence with, “My girlfriend…

Well, now. I definitely did not see that one coming.

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BNF caught me taking this photo as we were on our way back from L.A. yesterday.

Quite honestly, I’d never taken the time to look at the back of my pretzel bag, and had no idea I was missing out on such comprehensive instructions. Or that I was skipping so many steps as I enjoyed my snack.

My favorite, though?

Keep empty packet to remind yourself to book at airtran.com, where you’ll always find our lowest fares.

In other words, “keep your trash so you remember our website, where you may not find the lowest fares ever, but at least they’ll be our lowest.

Oh, AirTran. This ploy just reeks of desperation.

Try a little subtlety next time; it’s become extremely underrated.

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Do you want to win $70 to spend on anything here? Are you super smart OR a really good guesser? Have you Truth or Failed yet? Do it, to it! You have until midnight tonight – answers and winner tomorrow!

Every so often I’ll use this little blog to look back and see where I was a year ago. And I pray to God that I’ve made at least some progress since then. It’s often hit or miss. But this time, looking back, it was obvious.

One year ago today, I was taking the GRE. I was stuck in a room with about 10 other people, at any given time, slowly plodding away at questions that were going to decide where (or, whether or not) I went to grad school. I’d been studying for the previous four months; I was nervous as hell; I, of course, had a bit of a head cold and wasn’t allowed to bring my own tissues in (what was I going to do, write the answers on them?); and I was still thrown off by the fact that at one point during my studying I’d forgotten how many degrees were in a triangle.

Now, as of this July 1st (and, speaking of, how is it July already?) not only have I gotten into the program I’d been dreaming about, but I’ll be starting this fall. I’ve already signed up for my classes, and been in touch with one of my future professors. And I’m excited.

I realize, of course, that this makes me sound like a huge dork. And that, perhaps, I won’t be quite as excited when I’m working on a paper all weekend while my friends are out having fun, or when the boyfriend has to come visit me in the library, because that’s the only time we’ll see each other that week. (I’ve already apologized to him in advance for this.)

But it is still exciting to be taking that next step. And to see something I’ve worked so hard for come to fruition.

And that’s enough to make my soon-to-be lack of a social life almost completely worth it.

Wait, what?

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When I started running with my group I signed up with their page on Meetup.com to get the alerts and stay connected and whatnot. I didn’t fill out a whole lot of information about other interests – preferring to keep it simple – but I did agree to get an email once a week, letting me know about other Meetup groups in the area. Up until recently, I nearly always deleted those emails without reading them (unless they were from my specific group). But the other week, one of the groups in the “recommended for you” category caught my attention:

The Baltimore Area Lesbian Singles Meetup Group

Now, I don’t have anything against any of those descriptors, but only one is really applicable. (Unless DC is considered “Baltimore Area”? I don’t think so.) So, I was surprised, to say the least, but I just let it drop.

But then, yesterday, the recommendations made it clear that I need to go back into my profile settings and fix something, because this is what I was given:

1) The DC Indians Meetup Group

Okay, admittedly, this could be fun and interesting. But I’m still at a loss as to how it’s a recommendation for me.

2) FitMommi


This is what I imagine. And, judging from their page, I don't think I'm *too* far off.

FitMommi classes are designed to provide an appropriate work-out for moms who are pregnant, who just had a baby, or whose children are school-age. Classes cater to beginners, and workouts are adjusted to suit advanced attendees.

All FitMommi classes are intended to promote physical health and mental well-being, but most importantly, FitMommi classes offer a support system for moms who are likely to have the same questions, struggles, goals and priorities.

And that’s fantastic! Good for them. But, the last time I checked, I was neither pregnant, nor had recently given birth. I’m pretty sure that’s something I would notice.

3) Healthy Family Weight Loss

Just in case I didn’t get the memo from the FitMommi group, this one’s here to assure me that I can keep both myself and my family in shape. And there’s complementary daycare while the group meets. Thank goodness. Because I wouldn’t want to have to find a sitter for my imaginary children.

Now I’m kind of torn. There’s a part of me that wants to examine why I’ve been getting recommendations like these – and possibly make it stop.

But the other part is just wondering what they’ll recommend next.

It certainly makes Mondays just a little more interesting.

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This still isn’t a sports blog, but after watching a handful of football games yesterday (and one VERY important and amazing baseball game last night), I couldn’t resist.

Yeah, my Eagles lost, and that sucks. And they had a fair amount of injuries, which, knowing them, doesn’t bode well for next week’s game.

But then again, next week’s game is against the Redskins – who I’ve almost started to feel bad for. They can’t seem to catch any breaks – or, rather, to do anything right. Although, in professional sports, I’ve never been quite sure who the responsibility lies with, when the team is doing poorly.

  • Some blame the coach. He is, theoretically, the one in charge, who has a handle on the strengths and weaknesses. But what if the team doesn’t have talent in the first place? Or if, for whatever reason, they just don’t mesh? Sometimes the coach can only do so much.
  • Some blame the players, themselves. They clearly have (some of) the necessary skills, otherwise they wouldn’t even be on the professional level. And if the coaching is that bad, shouldn’t the team, in theory, be able to organize itself? Maybe take a stand against poor leadership? A novel idea, I know.
  • And then there are some who blame the owner. And, of the Redskins fans I know, several have taken this route. One, who, during games, has his children chanting, “Fire Snyder! *clap clap clapclapclap*,” even passed along this website, with the same sentiment. I don’t know if you can actually impeach an owner, but if there is a way, I’m sure Washington fans will find it.


Quite honestly, I’m not so concerned with whose *fault* this poor performance is. Intrigued is a better word for what I am. And as much pity as I have for the them, I just hope that they don’t get their act together too much before next week’s Monday night game.

Because I’d really hate to lose to a team whose coach isn’t even allowed to call the shots anymore. That would just be embarrassing.

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